DEADBROKE DADS BLOG

The Sociopathic Behaviour of Large Corporations

2009-11-11T16:45:00Z

The Sociopathic Behaviour of Large Corporations

One only needs to be reminded what a corporation is to understand why and how they are allowed to come down hard on the average working people that they are suppose to be serving. When greed is put into the equation...

Content Source: Bukisa - The Sociopathic Behaviour of Large Corporations

Conscious TV - On Parental Alienation

2009-08-19T21:51:00Z

These wonderful ladies on BraveHeart have a great program on Parental Alienation. The program is enlightening and hopefully can teach lost souls about some effects of divorce. Dorcy Russell's interview is brilliant and covers most aspect of Parental Alienation with her own experiences. Some men out there deserve to hear this, since it can help them determine the cause of some confusion and anger that is caused by this form of child abuse.

Conscious TV - Today's Show Conscious Co-Parenting @ Yahoo! Video

http://braveheartwomen.com/- Conscious TV-On today's show theBraveHeart panel talks with DorcyRussell, the founder of the"Conscious Co-Parenting Institute", aboutstrategies and solutions for parents and children struggling with"Parental Alienation" and high conflict divorce. Whether you're lookingfor solutions in this area or not, this show will enlighten you!

When A Utility Company Monopolizes...Hydro One Can

2009-08-07T13:06:20Z

As a divorced dad that is constantly being bombarded by an ex wife for increased child support in a family law system that is unrealistic to non custodial parents, one can imagine that my budget is tight as well as periodically disrupted. It wouldn’t be so bad if I can predict when a new court order was being dreamed up by my ex wife, then I would financially prepare myself by socking away an “ex wife emergency fund”. However, in this system of modern day slavery, where the average pay raises does not increase as quickly as the cost of living, ones budget seems to be playing catch up all the time. Of course every smart income earner should always save away at the least 6 months of salary as an emergency fund. I know you’re thinking, yeah right I live pay check to pay check like every other working stiff. Whether you are capable to acquire and Emergency Fund or not, it is still a very comforting thing to have. It can help you pull yourself out of a financial pinch, like having to get your vehicle fixed, helping you find another job after losing your last one, or anything life changing which effects your budget...and let’s face it, everything cost money today, emergency or not. One cannot even step out his front door without spending $20 today.

So, because of the way society is today, it seems like most people are never satisfied, and if you are unfortunately connected to an extreme case of personal dissatisfaction, then there is never light at the end of the tunnel. In the last half of the year, I was ordered to return to the family courts by my ex wife, this is the fourth time in 13 years; I even kind of anticipated it since her time was due. The crazy thing about it is that I prepared myself for it. She was going on several luxury trips a year, her husband had purchased a new Harley Davidson motorcycle, she was on her third vehicle, and they were taking sailing lessons, you can almost see the writing on the wall. When she had my daughter serve me a letter with family court order written all over it, I wasn’t surprised.

A few months pass, I get ordered to pay $1404 per month child support, with $15,000 back pay (51% of my wages), and she was heading out to Mexico with my children for a luxury trip. Wham; there goes my Emergency Fund and a lot more! After that, the following 5-6 months I was struggling not to lose my shirt, I missed a few utility bills. My biggest utility bill was with Hydro One, a crucial necessity for a household, especially when the house is heated primarily by electricity. In the deep of winter, this corporate giant, Hydro One, was threatening to cut us off if we didn’t catch up with our electric bills. Their automated robot bill collector was calling us every second day or so and leaving messages on our answering machine. It was eerie hearing a robot ask us for money to the point of harassment. We called Hydro One’s telephone representatives to ask for assistance to no avail, and ended up paying our electricity bill using credit cards.

Even though we managed to pay Hydro One’s bill, they still insist that we pay their Debt Reduction Fee. You see, we’ve been paying diligently for over 8 years, this Hydro One’s debt off, a debt that was incurred by mismanagement and CEO’s giving themselves million dollar bonuses in the past. These CEOs, which were given Golden Handshakes for bringing down a company, that should have never lost money; a company that has everyone in the country as a customer, providing them with a service that is as necessary as having to eat on a daily basis. I know that sounds a little dramatic, but electricity is crucial, some can live without it, but most modern day slaves need it so their alarm clock can wake them up in the morning.

The kicker is ... now get this ... Hydro One has just sent us a bill, even after we managed to ride out a few months of late payments, they send us a bill with a $1,336.60 Adjustment fee. What is this you might ask yourself? We get this bill on top of our regular monthly payment for electricity, in the middle of summer when all is quiet and our bills are caught up, this Adjustment fee which is a fee charged in case we have trouble paying our bill again. Did you get that? What a greedy world we are living in today!

This Story Echoes Across Our Nations

2009-07-10T12:40:00Z

This next article printed in The Globe and Mail is a true story. It is happening to non custodial parents, especially fathers, in every family courts across our nations. This is not just happening to the deadbeat dads, this is happening to the contributing members of our society. The men who work hard at trying to establish a good future for his family, following all the rules and regulations pushed down their throats, jumping through the fire hoops to success, and even doing dirty jobs that they are not even meant to do. For this reason, men usually die at an earlier age than woman due to occupational illnesses and financial stress, never mind the added stress of being alienated by their children because of unrealistic family court orders imposed on them.

When I read an article like the following, my heart swells and my sympathy for these poor fathers grow. I know this from my own experience of being dragged into the family courts numerous times in the last 15 years. To sum this one up, if one was keeping track, this is another win for vengeful custodial parents and the associated members of the family courts. Without these divorced fathers, profits for others could never be achieved.

Globe and Mail Article

What do you think?

Father ordered to pay $20,000 punishment

KIRK MAKIN

JUSTICE REPORTER — From Monday's Globe and Mail
Last updated on Tuesday, Jul. 07, 2009 07:32AM EDT

An Ontario Superior Court judge has ordered a crusading fathers'-rights activist to pay $20,000 to the federal government as punishment for mounting an ill-founded challenge to federal child-support payment guidelines.

Mr. Justice Alan C.R. Whitten ruled that Lucien Khodeir's negligence lawsuit amounted to a delaying tactic designed to forestall him having to pay support orders of $1,230 - including arrears - for Mr. Khodeir's 12- and 14-year-old children.

Several weeks ago, Judge Whitten dismissed the lawsuit after a brief hearing.

"Access to justice does not mean an absence of consequences or responsibilities," he said in the costs ruling. "It is trite to say that no one wishes to discourage meritorious claims, but it would be naive to think that all claims are per se meritorious."

Judge Whitten said that Mr. Khodeir is not a hero, but a public nuisance. He likened Mr. Khodeir to a citizen who phones the fire department to report an emergency: "Having so accessed this service, we should be prepared to face the consequences - costs or otherwise - if we phone in a false alarm or something we can readily extinguish ourselves."

However, Mr. Khodeir said in an interview that the cost ruling is another example of judges shutting the courtroom doors to self-represented litigants who display the audacity to attack a sacred legal shibboleth such as the child-support guidelines.

Mr. Khodeir said that he is in debt "up to my eyeballs," but he will not be deterred from his campaign to overturn guidelines that he regards as unfair, arbitrary and discriminatory toward men.

"I'm not going to give up until I'm either dead or something else stops me from proceeding," Mr. Khodeir said. "They are trying to say that I'm just bitching about my child support, but that is not what I'm doing at all."

Mr. Khodeir - a self-employed Hamilton tax auditor - accused Judge Whitten of making up his mind before ever hearing any arguments in the case.

"Every time I opened my mouth, he would shut me up," Mr. Khodeir said. He added that, out of a total of approximately 50 court appearances he has made, only on one occasion was he treated fairly by a judge.

"I don't expect to win every argument, but I'm fairly intelligent and educated, so I should be able to win one or two arguments along the way," he said. "Generally, judges don't like to hear from self-represented litigants because they consider them a waste of time."

In addition to his failed lawsuit, Mr. Khodeir has been pursuing a separate case in family court that also alleges that the child-support guidelines are an unconstitutional add-on to the Divorce Act.

He claimed that the guidelines were improperly drafted by a group of bureaucrats and family-law experts, and that they fail to take into consideration an individual's ability to pay.

The presiding judge in the family-court motion has reserved his ruling.
In his ruling on the costs award, Judge Whitten conceded that Mr. Khodeir is an intelligent man who is adept at citing past judgments and precedents.

However, Judge Whitten said that he was not impressed by the purported novelty of Mr. Khodeir's submissions, nor by his elaborate attempt to present himself as being "the model of reasonableness."

You're Bigger Then That!

2009-07-03T20:52:00Z

Months later, after seeking a lawyer’s advice, a new court order has been written up. The child support payments are still higher than my salary base, but it’s settled...until the next round of changes due to disgruntles. The only difference now is that my wages have significantly dropped. There are layoffs looming, corporate income losses, factories shutting down, and everyone is changing the way they do business.

The only thing that does not change, are family court orders issued on dead broke noncustodial parents, when this occurs, it is time to revisit the family laws and its courts. It can almost be marked down like a holiday or a pre set event...every fiscal cycle, every time the law is tweaked, every time there is a lifestyle change...etc. We can call it Deadbroke Deadbeats Season, where lawyers, judges, and their associates can apply for licenses to be able to hunt categorised species of deadbeats, deadbrokes, or whatever they like. With the family court system, anytime something changes (even something like a new pair a shoes) the custodial parent has a right to obtain their share, using the new improved rules of the day, or whichever.

In the extreme case, this can be due to the fact that the noncustodial parent obtained a higher skill, I’ve heard things like “he’s a good carpenter, and that pays well, but he has a law degree, that pays even better and he’s income potentials are greater”. In other words, the family court judge can base a child support payments on the payer’s potential income...so image that, you can be happy and very good at selling shoes for $25,000 per year, but instead you get ordered to pay child support on the $100,000 per year because of the higher stature you might be able to hold. Do you get that? Because if you do then, please explain to me where in that ideology, is the ability for an individual to live their own chosen life, comes in here? Go ahead leave your comment, nobody here is scared of the truth.

Going broke is ok, all depending on your lifestyle...you get what you need but don't get what you want. Make a little donation if you like www.DeadBrokeDad.ca. All proceeds will help in maintaining this website, and if you're my ex wife, instead of going on the second Caribean Cruise this year and have extra, I can use some cash to pay next months child support.

DeadBroke Dad's Father's Day Yard Sale

2009-06-19T16:39:00Z

After seven months of paying out 51% of my wages, the time has come to start liquidating to start paying off the credit cards we've been racking up to living on. This is the result of continuous respondents to child support family court orders, the fourth time in 13 years as a matter of fact. So we are having.....

A DEADBROKE DAD'S FATHER'S DAY YARD SALE! Come one, come all, everything but the dog is FOR SALE!

On June 20 & 21, 2009 (Father's Day) starting at 7:00 A.M. till everything is sold! Bring your friends, family, even your KIDS (because my two will probably not be here for the first time ever...long P.A.S. story). Coffee will be on, and as a Bonus Door Prize, if you can guess the breed of our mutt dog, you win the used toaster oven!

Below are snapshots of our stuff, everything you see in these photos has to go; that is, anything that is not attached to the house.




Contact us at deadbrokedad@deadbrokedad.ca for location and we can start Bartering! Or Visit DbD on

Alec Knows My Pain...

2009-06-17T00:03:00Z

ALEC BALDWIN CONSIDERED SUICIDE OVER CUSTODY BATTLE OF HIS DAUGHTER!

The man with a swaggering attitude, Alec Baldwin, he can have anything in Hollywood, anything but his daughter thanks to the family law system.

I’ve seen a few of Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger’s movies and television performances and I really enjoyed their style. Alec’s attitude always made me giggle in a manly kind of way, however i always admired a man who can sway like John Wayne and not look silly at it.

Now poor Alec feels the pain of many other fathers, the dads that are all tied up in a financial and emotional knot by the family law system that's gone a little on the wacky side. Gone are the days when the man of the house…oh sorry…that story isn’t used anymore; or it may sound a little to “wife beaterish”. The truth of the matter is, that there is a lost feeling when a father can’t be there for his own flesh and blood at any given time. The worries about the upbringing of your children, hoping to shed light on them when you have that little time with them, and hoping the short experiences were positive. You make time, more qualitative than quantitative, which can be a very demanding job, especially when some outside and sometimes alien rules have been imposed on yours and children’s time. The bottom line is, dads watch over their own, even if at a distance.

“Academy Award nominated actor and single dad Alec Baldwin considered killing himself when his nasty answering machine message to his pre-teen daughter at her mother's house was leaked to the press, according to People Magazine. He called the teenager a "rude little pig" who needed her "ass straignted out" and had "humiliated me for the last time." It was ugly. No denials there.”

"Kim Basinger starred as Domino in the Bond flick Never Say Never Again, showed off her assets in the '80s erotic film 9 1/2 Weeks, portrayed Vicky Vale in Batman, and showed us her comedic side as Honey Hornee in Wayne's World 2.” AskMen.com

Visit DeadBroke's Hide Out
I salute the media coverage of Alec and Kim’s real life drama...this looks good on our society and its man made systems…makes me feel like i am not alone and that i belong!

Alec Baldwin considered suicide in custody battle over his daughter

Profit From Misfortune

2009-06-08T17:41:00Z

Have you heard of this? Call me a lumberjack or whatever…but former bankers making money off divorce cases? I wonder how much money these guys are making, a little bit of Profit From Misfortune eh boys!

Then I asked myself, “What the heck sir…why didn’t you think of that?” As quickly as i asked myself that question, an answer interrupted it instantly. One thing is for sure, i would not want to be on the frontlines of that business. Imagine processing your cliental face to face? I don’t know, again i can’t wrap my brain around this one; the bottom line is that, it all adds up to one conclusion, someone is making money off someone else’s misery.

This means that these former bankers who started this business, they understand and sympathize with their cliental, want to be there for them, and will provide them with the best service available so their clients can get the best outcome from their divorces. In order to maximize your profits out of your service, you must provide that service with all your heart and soul, the larger your passion is put into the job, the bigger the return. And if you enjoy what you’re doing, then you have almost reached your maximum profits. You are the richest person alive!

I guess that sounds lucrative, people are willing to pay thousands of dollars for a good lawyer, might as well throw in another thousand or so in order for you to be organized, and so you don’t get confused by the family Laws, the family courts, the big bad judges, the tigershark lawyers, the extra fees, the collecting agencies, the head shrinks, and the two cops that come and pick you up if you’re not happy with the hand that was just dealt to you. Why not through in the Divorce Shield package, especially if it can get rid of the two police officers. “One can make money off this…”, the little capitalist voice says in my head, but then i take peek inside my very existence, the basic instinctive feelings it carries and holds in my soul, and think, “wholly crap man, being a bloodsucker in this day of age can be VERY lucrative!”.

This fellow blogger has a better idea on how one can Profit From Misfortune.

Enchiridion

A Guide to Freedom and Happiness

How to Profit From Misfortune

“Every time something bad or unpleasant happens to you, ask yourself what skills, resources or powers you have for turning that accident into an opportunity for self-development. If you see an attractive person, for example, you have within you the power of self-restraint to overcome your desire. If you're in pain, you have the strength to endure pain. If you hear harsh language, you have patience. By focusing on the defensive weapons you already posses, rather than the assault, you will grow those defences and not be defeated by bad or unpleasant things in life.”

Divorce, Family Counselling, Divorce and Money - Divorce Shield

Best & Worst Movie Parents

2009-06-08T14:00:26Z

Best & Worst Movie Parents

“Parental Guilt can be strong, especial in divorce cases, here is a compilation of the best and worst movie parents. Hopefully we can learn from these famous parents to curve our Parental Guilt.” In my opinion Darth Vader is the worst of the worst.

In Away We Go, John Krasinski and Maya Rudolph play expectant parents traveling the US in search of the perfect location to raise their child who worry about how good they'll be at parenting. That got us thinking about some of the most extreme examples of good and bad parenting that we've ever seen in movies. We're not talking Atticus Finch here: we're looking at good moms like Sarah Connor and bad dads like Darth Vader. Below, take a look at our extreme list of the best and worst movie parents.

Beverly Sutphin
Serial Mom
Played by Kathleen Turner
What’s an average suburban housewife to do when her neighbours refuse to recycle and her kids are humiliated by school teachers and cheating dates? Why, if you’re Beverly Sutphin (Kathleen Turner) – wife, mother, and sociopathic killer in John Waters’ delightfully demented Serial Mom – the answer is simple: homicide. Son Chip (Matthew Lillard) gets reprimanded at school? A teacher gets run over. A woman wears white after Labour Day? She’ll think twice… after being bludgeoned to death! Although Beverly’s methods are, well, violent and illegal, she means well. And at the end of the day, with your husband and children safe at home, and Suzanne Somers set to play you in the TV movie based on your life, isn’t that what family is all about?

Sarah Connor
Terminator 2: Judgment Day
Played by Linda Hamilton
When we first meet Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton) in James Cameron’s Terminator, she’s a meek single gal on the lam to protect her unborn child from a futuristic cyborg. When we catch up with her ten years later in Terminator 2: Judgment Day, she’s become the world’s toughest mama; lean and muscled (thanks to Hamilton’s incredible off-screen training regimen) and stuck in a mental institution, Connor lives for one thing, and one thing only: to reunite with her ten-year-old son John. Luckily, with the help of another father figure from the future (Arnold Schwarzenegger as a kinder, gentler Terminator), Sarah cobbles together her atypical family unit, putting all those years of mercenary living, arms collecting, and weapons training to good use in order to protect her only son – and with him, the future of mankind – from total nuclear annihilation. If that isn't maternal dedication, we don’t know what is.

Diane Freeling
Poltergeist
Played by JoBeth Williams
In 1982’s Poltergeist, Diane Freeling starts out as a relatively typical housewife: she’s married to a successful real estate agent, she’s got three great kids, she lives in a nice house in the suburbs, and she’s not above smoking a little weed with her husband when she thinks the kids are in bed. Admittedly, at the first few signs of paranormal trouble, the whole family stays in the house. (But what are they supposed to do? If they left, there’d be no movie). Once her daughter Carol Ann disappears, taken to The Other Side by restless (and angry) spirits, Diane really shows her mettle. The kids get sent away, but Diane and her husband stay in their now obviously haunted house, unwilling to leave Carol Anne behind. Ultimately, Diane’s maternal instincts lead her to cross over herself to physically drag her daughter back into the world of the living. If your mother tells you she’d go to Hell and back for you, this is the kind of thing she’s talking about.

Jim's Dad
American Pie
Played by Eugene Levy
At first glance, Jim’s dad is about what you’d expect from the father of the sexually-frustrated geek in a teen sex comedy. He seems to be clueless, and is obviously trying way too hard to be cool in his son’s eyes. And the poor guy doesn’t even get a name in American Pie; he’s just known as “Jim’s dad” (for the record, he’s eventually revealed to be named Noah Levenstein). But any father willing to cover up his son’s misadventures with a warm dessert is tops in our book. And there’s actual wisdom behind the goofball façade, not just clueless fatherly advice. Jim’s dad turns out to be surprisingly honest and insightful with his son, and ends up being the recurring voice of wisdom throughout the increasingly raunchy American Pie franchise.

Helen Parr (AKA Elastigirl)
The Incredibles
Played by Holly Hunter
Helen Parr (Holly Hunter), or Elastigirl, might just be the perfect mother. When she and her husband Bob (Craig T. Nelson), aka Mr. Incredible, are forced to hide their super identities and retreat to suburbia, she does her best to focus on raising their three children. When Bob is nearly arrested during a late night escapade, Helen holds it together and avoids an argument for the sake of the children. Later, when Bob is swept up into a plot on his life by an alluring mystery woman, Helen flies to the rescue, and when she discovers that her two older children have tagged along, she not only does her utmost to keep them safe, but she helps them develop and master their own superpowers. Bob eventually comes around and realizes how his actions have affected his family, but it’s Helen who truly forms the rubber cement that binds them together throughout the whole ordeal. And in many ways, Helen is representative of housewives the world over, who constantly make sacrifices for the greater good of the family, and who all possess the ability to smack you from across the room before you even realize what you’ve done wrong.

Daniel Hillard
Mrs. Doubtfire
Played by Robin Williams
There are few parents who love their kids as much as Daniel Hillard (Robin Williams) loves his. Faced with a divorce that leaves him without custody of his children, Daniel does what any loving father would: he poses as an old, English woman to become the household nanny.
Now, before you make any judgments about Daniel’s psychological well-being (is Robin Williams ever not crazy?), consider that, as Mrs. Doubtfire, Daniel is able to cook (or buy catering) for the family, spend time on his children’s favourite activities, and oversee their study habits. Sure, he might be a little bitter at his ex (Sally Field), and he might take it out on her new beau (Pierce Brosnan), but Daniel’s love for his children is never in question, and any father who’s willing to cross-dress just to spend a few hours with his children deserves credit.

Bryan Mills
Taken
Played by Liam Neeson
There has been no greater example of a father's outsized love for his children in recent memory than Taken, which was likely initially pitched as "Liam Neeson stabbing, shooting, and choking foreigners for 90 minutes while searching for his daughter." The movie is full of exemplary daddy-daughter advice (who didn't get charged up during the scene where Neeson frankly tells his daughter her abduction is inevitable?), and punchy speeches: "I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you." Now that's tough love.

Rosemary Woodhouse
Rosemary's Baby
Played by Mia Farrow
Psycho, Carrie, Dead Alive -- there's no shortage of rotten mothers in horror. But if you wanted to explore who would occupy the opposite end of the spectrum, one choice ought to immediately jump out: Rosemary Woodhouse. As Roman Polanski’s tense thriller reveals Rosemary’s pregnancy cycle, we see her motherly devotion to her unborn, despite all the trials and tribulations of her unique circumstances: confrontations by bizarre neighbours with tannis-root drinks, a suspicious husband, weirdly blanching skin, and, er, demon rape. We say Rosemary's Baby's depiction of pregnancy is the craziest of all time; even Juno had some sassy friends and hipster irony to get her through it.

The Worst

Margaret White
Carrie
Played by Piper Laurie
If parents often misunderstand their teenage children, most still attempt to encourage them through their difficult high school years. Not Margaret White (Piper Laurie), however; she’s convinced her daughter Carrie (Sissy Spacek) is a wretched tool of Satan. Even worse, she doesn’t want her outcast daughter to attend the wicked, sinful prom. Though one can take exception to Margaret’s methods, she does have a point; Carrie possesses telekinetic powers that allow her to wreak havoc on her insensitive classmates. Still, if Margaret had just loosened up a bit, and not berated her daughter with such barbs as “They’re all gonna laugh at you,” Carrie could possibly have been a productive member of society – as well as the steady gal pal of Tommy.

Darth Vader The Worstest
The Empire Strikes Back
Played by James Earl Jones, David Prowse, C. Andrew Nelson
Darth Vader is considered one of cinema’s most commanding villains, but when it comes right down to it, he’s also the poster boy for intergalactic deadbeats. Growing up on Tatooine, Luke Skywalker had to make do without his dad, who was too busy trying to conquer the universe to call or write. (And it seems unlikely he ever paid child support.) Luke got off easy; dear old dad blew up his daughter Leia’s childhood planet. Of course, once he finds out his son has the Force, then he wants to have a relationship. He turns into one of those over-involved parents who live vicariously through their more-talented offspring. Nothing like having the Universe on your shoulders!

Jack Torrance
The Shining
Played by Jack Nicholson
Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson) is your average troubled author: a recovering alcoholic with anger management issues, and a sometime child abuser. Hoping to get his next novel off the ground, he makes an executive decision to move his family, including his young son Danny (Danny Lloyd), to a remote hotel in the heart of the Rockies for a snowy winter of absolute isolation, which, you know, screams “fun for the kids.” So it’s not surprising when little Danny begins having disturbing premonitions about the extended stay. Unfortunately for Danny, he has good reason to worry. As a supernatural cabin fever sets itself upon him, Jack slowly begins losing his mind, lashing out at his family, holding conversations and make out sessions with sinister spirits in the hotel, and oh! Let’s not forget he ultimately comes after his wife (Shelley Duvall) and Danny with a murderous glint in his eye. Sorry Jack - stalking your family with a bloody axe is simply not the way to go about announcing your candidacy for Father of the Year.

Daniel Plainview
There Will Be Blood
Played by Daniel Day-Lewis
Lone wolf prospector and enterprising oil man Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis) starts out with good intentions, adopting the infant son of an employee killed on the job and raising him as his own. Little H.W. (Dillon Freasier) even becomes Plainview’s “partner” of sorts, the pair teaming up to buy land from desperate town folk as a father-and-son enterprise. Then again, using your child to promote your own business isn’t the most moral of parenting endeavours; neither is it very responsible to leave him unattended on a mining site, where a chance accident could leave him deaf for life. Though Plainview tries his best, the life of a ruthless businessman isn’t most conducive to fostering healthy relationships, and by the time a grown H.W. comes asking for fatherly release, all he gets from his bitter old man is a painful disowning.

Joan Crawford
Mommie’s Dearest
Played by Faye Dunaway
If Christina Crawford’s muckraking autobiography Mommie Dearest is to be believed (and some claim it isn’t), her adoptive mother, Hollywood legend Joan, was a monster. We beg to differ. Joan showed admirable concern for the less fortunate by donating Christina’s birthday presents to charity. She instilled discipline in her child by emphasizing cleanliness (and destroying her bathroom when the little brat left some dust lying around). And let’s be honest: Christina just didn’t value all the nice clothes that Joan bought for her. What other reason would she have for dangling her garments on those lousy wire hangers? In addition, Joan obviously felt her children should display some self-reliance, rather than riding the Hollywood gravy train the rest of their lives. Let’s face it: getting disinherited builds character.

Allie Fox
The Mosquito Coast
Played by Harrison Ford
For most parents, establishing a safe, secure environment for their children is priority number one. Allie Fox (Harrison Ford), however, believes what’s best for his family is to drag them all to the jungles of Central America on a Col. Kurtzian journey into the heart of darkness. Of course, instilling a sense of adventure and passion in one’s kids is admirable, but… establishing a new civilization seems a little dubious. Egomaniacal, even. If your aim is family bonding, it’s probably a better idea to just rent Swiss Family Robinson rather than trying to re-enact it with the wife and kids.

Eleanor Iselin
The Manchurian Candidate
Played by Angela Lansbury
Being a Godless commie doesn’t necessarily make one a bad parent. Brainwashing your son into becoming a political assassin, however, does. Such is the case with Eleanor Iselin (Angela Lansbury), whose idea of family game night is demanding that her son Raymond Shaw (Laurence Harvey) play a few rounds of solitaire, thereby turning him into a remorseless killing machine. She also doesn’t like his fiancée, his friends, or anyone that might distract him from assassinating presidential candidates and allowing her to wrest control of the country. But she’s not the only dubious parent in The Manchurian Candidate; Raymond’s stepdad, Senator John Yerkes Iselin, is too busy making bombastic public statements to exhibit much interest in his war hero stepson.

Peter and Kate McCallister
Home Alone
Played by John Heard and Catherine O'Hara
Outside of John Hughes's fantasy America, Peter and Kate McCallister would probably have been investigated for parental negligence. In Home Alone, they leave their youngest son (Macaulay Culkin) at home to fend off two notorious burglars. Then, in Home Alone 2, they ditch him in New York -- city of cranks, prostitutes, and evil hotel concierges. (Good thing the crazy pigeon ladies there are so friendly!) Yet, bad parents though they are, it's hard to find Peter and Kate truly detestable for abandoning little Kevin McCallister (twice, even) because... well, Kevin's a spoiled snot and he probably deserved it.

Angel (lascivit) wrote in ohnotheydidnt,
@ 2009-06-05 11:23:00

ohnotheydidnt: Best & Worst Movie Parents

Are You Parenting From Guilt?

2009-06-06T11:21:33Z

In every story, there is always a “Bad Guy”, and in most divorce cases, there are stories. Now, depending on the circumstances, the “Bad Guy” role can change from hand to hand. For example one parent blaming the other for whatever little current problem that might arise in the situation, we’ve all done this even out of family matters…”Mom is late because she is putting her career before your family again” or “Your father would rather go out fishing instead of going to the theatre with his kids”.

The following is an excerpt from The 7 Pitfalls of Single Parenting: What to Avoid to Help Your Children Thrive after Divorce by Carolyn B. Ellis (New York: iUniverse, 2007)

“When a couple decides to separate and starts the process of splitting up the children’s family home into two separated homes, there is inevitably a sense of guilt. Divorce is an adult problem created between two adults, but as parents watching our children adjust to going to “mom’s house” and “dad’s house” and spending time apart from one of their parents, it can break your heart just a little bit more.”

Parenting from guilt is a hazard that befalls… many single parents. You know you’re stuck if you have repetitive negative thoughts that forecast doom and gloom, like, “What have I done? My children are never going to be able to get over this divorce!” Frequent pangs of guilt rob you of the ability to enjoy the positive experiences of life. You assume the worst and conclude the divorce is to blame for common childhood situations such as your child doing something wrong, acting out, or simply having a bad day. You berate yourself and second-guess your decisions and instincts.

As divorced parents, we must realize that guilt is actually a choice. No one can make you feel guilty without your consent and participation in buying a ticket for the guilt trip. Sometimes we express guilt as a way to elicit sympathy from others or as a way to stay stuck and powerless. Ultimately, languishing in a sense of guilt is not doing your children any favours. “Parenting from guilt can cause you to focus on “doing” things with your children, as opposed to “being” with them.

Here are some strategies to stop parenting from guilt:

Be Aware of Any Active Guilt Complexes
Awareness of your default programming and guilt complexes is the first and most crucial step in releasing old patterns.
Choose “Being” Instead of “Buying”
Some studies have shown that American parents spend less than 12 minutes daily connecting with their children.
Question Yourself
If you are plagued with guilt about your children’s well-being, question yourself honestly. Is that really the truth? Or is that just a fear?”

Are You Parenting From Guilt? from http://www.thriveafterdivorceblog.com

Parental Alienation - Hosted by Anna Maria Tremonti On CBC Radio "The Current"

2009-06-02T10:16:00Z

"Rhonda Pisarello was eight years old when her parents divorced. Her sisters were seven and one. Rhonda's father was awarded custody of the three girls. And her mother was granted the right to see them a few days each week. A year after the divorce, Rhonda's father remarried. Rhonda is an adult now and she picked up the story from there. We aired a clip.

Rhonda's story has all the hallmarks of what we now call Parental Alienation. The number of court cases that involve Parental Alienation is getting more attention these days but it is not new to our court system.

Nick Bala has just completed the first study of how Canadian courts and judges have handled Parental Alienation over the last 20 years. He's a professor in the Faculty of Law at Queen's University and he was in Kingston, Ontario."

Amy J. L. Baker, Ph.D

2009-06-02T01:36:00Z

Dr. Baker is a nationally recognized expert in parent child relationships, especially children of divorce, parental alienation syndrome, and emotional abuse of children.

What happens to children who are manipulated by one parent to turn against the other? Do these children ever figure it out and reconcile with their "lost" parent?

DeadBroke Dad's Book Wish List

2009-05-22T22:53:00Z

Talking about Pajamas TV - Ask Dr. Helen - Keeping "Deadbeat Dads" Off the Air; Marriages & the Recession - Video

2009-05-14T13:29:00Z

Here is a refreshing News Media who seems to not be influenced by mainstream lobbyist...yet. There are a few news reports here that brings out the truth of the matters.

Pajamas TV - Ask Dr. Helen - Keeping "Deadbeat Dads" Off the Air; Marriages & the Recession - Video
Keeping "Deadbeat Dads" Off the Air; Marriages & the Recession

Pajamas Media (PJM) was established in 2004 and is a network of about 100 bloggers that covers news and issues of the day in a refreshingly thoughtful and civil way. Led by CEO Roger Simon, the network includes well known personalities such as the “Instapundit,” Glenn Reynolds (named one of the 10 most influential legal scholars in America by the Social Science Research Network), and well known TV commentator Michelle Malkin. About 1 million people visit the PJM network every week (about 3.5 million monthly), many of whom, are politically center-right, with maybe 40% declaring they are Democrats.

It's The System I Tell You...

2009-05-13T13:50:00Z

Where does one stand when the system he was driven to participate in, keeps taking from him and beating down on him? You pay into the system as loyally as you can and the system fails you. The taxes, the insurances, the licenses, the levies, the permits, the administration fees, the “debt reduction” fees...it seems for every action i require or want to take, there is a fee for it. I am guesstimating that more than 50% of every dollar i earn goes to these fees. We can’t even step out the front door of our own homes without being taxed. The dreadful thing about the system is, when one really needs it to be there for them, the system frowns upon them, especially when money is involved. I am witnessing this phenomenon firsthand, one segment of the system beats down on you, and when you turn to another segment of the same system, which you paid into for help, it treats you like a burden of society.

So what are the steps one needs to take when such a system imposes such a burden on him? If you ever had to dig deep inside yourself for guidance during a personal crisis, you will find that emotions and ego tend to rise up first. But if you dig deeper past the emotions and ego, you’ll find the basic instincts come out. The moral guidelines embedded in our DNA; the guidelines that drive us to preserve our basic human needs. In today’s social systems, one can observe the lack of these basic instincts; it is almost like the system is behaving like a corporation. However, as much as a corporation can behave like an individual, it does so without the basic moral instincts human have. In other words, if a corporation chooses to be a psychopath, it can do so without remorse. When money is put into the equation, a corporation’s policy can drive its employees to lie for its preservation. Therefore, if you approach this kind of system with honesty and true intentions, you will witness a barrage of patronizing, deceptions, and all out lies. Anything will be done by the system to save a $1.

I ask the question again, “What are the steps one needs to take when such a system imposes such a burden on him?” The price paid to be a contributing citizen far out weight the returns. Usually a sane person will not try to negotiate with insanity; in my case i tend to ignore insanity unless it has a negative impact on my life. Can one disassociate oneself from this current system imposed on everyone from our social leaders, governments, and elitist? What do you think? Any Suggestions? I got some answers from Barry Schwartz, this video is brilliant!

Barry Schwartz makes a passionate call for practical wisdom as an antidote to a society gone mad with bureaucracy. He argues powerfully that rules often fail us, incentives often backfire, and practical, everyday wisdom will help rebuild our world.

The Strangest Thing about This Recession...

2009-04-29T12:00:00Z

Our current recession came as no surprise; if one paid attention, living day by day with your eyes and mind open...you notice that the old saying, “...you learn something everyday...” meant something. Not just the menial stuff like work and routine duties, that’s a given, but i’m talking about what the universe can tell you. Listening, living for the moment, paying attention to your surroundings and sometimes further, learning from almost everything and anything, using your gut instincts, you can see a pattern in our worldly behaviours. Then you start digging into our histories...you start noticing deeper patterns. Which in much case allows small predictions to occur? This recession came at us from afar, starting as a small star in the sky, to a large threatening fireball heading straight at our earth. At first notice, people can prepare themselves in order to survive the impact, while others don’t even notice until the obvious hits them in the forehead like a ton of bricks.

Well, i was prepared for this one. I’ve been living on the same budget for the last 15 years. When I purchased a house in 2000, my annual budget had been the same for years prior. The only difference in 2000 was that i had a life partner to grow with (in other words two incomes are better than one) almost sounds like two heads are better than one eh? As for the present moment 2009, my yearly wage is still the same as 2000 and we’ve been living on the same budget for the last 9 years. Our wages have been adjusted to the cost of living; however the cost of living has been speeding up faster than our wages, making our annual budget a little more tighter. This scheme is across the board; apparently our large corporations are feeling the pinch too.

The strangest thing about this recession, even though i took precautions to prepare my family for it, we will be on the list of the “biggest victims” of it. The one and only thing i blame it on, is our delusional and "ill thought out" Family Law system. A system that allows a custodial parent to obtain 51% of a supporting parent’s income, no matter what the custodial parent’s income and situation may be. A system that allows individuals to sink below our so called poverty line while another lives highly on that individual’s back. It sends out the message to our societies that financial vampirism of fellow human beings is acceptable. Really when you look deep into the root of this cause, you might notice that the head vampires are sitting behind desks in Ivory Towers.

So as a DeadBroke Dad, the best advise i can give is, keep your mind and eyes open every day, get ready to learn from your experiences instantly, and look out for the vampires (i think they are increasing in numbers and gathering).

Watch the following video and take it like you want...just don't go hide under your bed though...it's not as scary as the video producer makes it.

Corporate Vampires - Pt.1

I Feel Guilty In A Weird Kind Of Way

2009-04-25T00:51:00Z

We had to cancel our sponsorship with Plan Canada. For $35 per month we can help another family, less fortunate then us, by sponsoring one child. It's kind of ironic since that $35 makes a significant difference in an entire family’s life overseas, while we have poverty here, at home, in our own beautiful country. Can you IMAGING what a difference a Millionaire can make in comparison to our measly $35 per month? I’m not going to sit down and do the math on this one but, at $35 x 240 months (20 years) = $8,400. For a measly $8,400 you can make the first 20 years of an African child a little less poor. It's truly too bad that you can't apply a money value on the old saying "...the more you give, the more you get...".

This monthly payment cancellation hurt my feelings, especially when we had to tell the Plan Canada associate that we could not afford the $35 per month anymore. Then I wonder what kind of life that little kid in Africa would have on the $1,404 per month that i pay for child support. Kind of makes you feel weird, unsatisfied, baffled? I can’t put my finger on that one. Leaves me to wonder...should a Deadbeat Dad feel guilty if he is the Dollar per Day Sponsor of a poor African child through Plan Canada? Is that an oxymoron?

“For about a dollar a day, you can help provide a child with access to life's basic necessities including safe water, schooling, and medical care. Make a lasting difference.” Plan Canada

Deadbeat Dad Cartoon

2009-04-16T08:24:00Z

They Disconnect You If You Don't Pay?

2009-04-07T07:30:00Z

You pay into something all your life while taking it for granted, it's a service rendered for a nominal fee. I'm wondering if we really need it...we would lose a few benefits from it. Yet, if we sacrifice this, then we can pay for the other necessity, the car that brings me to our daily bread. The daily bread that cannot pay for this.

What happens when we lose the car that drives me to our daily bread?

My Bank Manager's Concern

2009-03-20T14:24:00Z

A couple of days ago, my bank manager called me, to discuss the fact that my mortgage payments were falling behind. Only 4 months after the court order, with 30% less pay, it feels like I just lost my job.

I hinted that I might need more money to pay for lawyers. This legal fight against the courts and my ex wife will be expensive. We have to decipher through all the lies and accusations. We have to locate and drag out our daughter's biological father to show the courts that my ex wife collects from him too. We have to prove to the courts that my ex wife makes more money than I, by disclosure of her personal and business income (if any). We have to prove to the courts that my ex wife spends copiously on luxury (living a caviar lifestyle and peanut butter and jam wages), and that no money has be saved for the kids education after receiving child support for the last 13 years. And the worst one, we have to prove to the courts is, that my son does not need special financial attention. You see, under my ex wife’s supervision, he’s been diagnosed with every possible mental disorder that all gifted children are being labelled for today. My son has had the opportunity to try most of the narcotics available for these kids, which angers me of course. The latest was the $2500 psychologist’s bill, where the very young doctor, diagnosed him gifted with a slight autistic behaviour. I look at my son, eye to eye, and I see a normal 15 year old teenage boy, actually a very bright solid boy (not to sound too much like proud daddy). The beauty of all this, is the fact that his school grades reflect his abilities. But enough of all these issues, this is about my banker.

As for the extra money for the legal battles, my banker shakes his head and changes the subject to the current problem, selling our house to alleviate our financial situation. He is concerned and is willing to help, he said (with one phone call) the bank can hold the mortgage payments on the months that we can’t pay, and focus on just paying the interest on our loans. After our big liquidation sale, we pay off the bank and then focus on finding money to prepare for our “Dog and Pony Show” in Family Courts.

Bankers might have the reputation of being greedy and uncaring (especially in these days), but human spirit of wanting to help still exist in their souls, as for lawyers, that’s a whole different story. As much as one can feel that the world is against them, if you stick to the truth of the matter, there is always a helping hand extended for you to grab.

Here is a video that caught my eye while thinking about our banking systems. It's called The Money Masters - How International Bankers Gained Control of America. Hope my banker doesn't takes this the wrong way.

	“Academy Award nominated actor and single dad Alec Baldwin considered killing himself when his nasty answering machine message to his pre-teen daughter at her mother's house was leaked to the press, according to People Magazine. He called the teenager a "rude little pig" who needed her "ass straignted out" and had "humiliated me for the last time." It was ugly. No denials there.”
"Kim Basinger starred as Domino in the Bond flick Never Say Never Again, showed off her assets in the '80s erotic film 9 1/2 Weeks, portrayed Vicky Vale in Batman, and showed us her comedic side as Honey Hornee in Wayne's World 2.” AskMen.com
Visit DeadBroke's Hide Out	*I salute the media coverage of Alec and Kim’s real life drama...this looks good on our society and its man made systems…makes me feel like i am not alone and that i belong!*